We are done with our break from last week, and back to a "normal school routine" this week. I am a person who not only likes routine, but is also eager to do tasks and check off tasks on "my list." However, the Lord keeps teaching me daily that, for our family, school at home isn't necessarily supposed to look that way. My children are not a "to do list" that I can keep checking off just to make myself feel that I am accomplishing something. They need to be nurtured and trained in ways that are meaningful to each of their unique personalities and giftings. I feel that I stifle their creativity and joy of learning when I am driving them to do what I want them to do. The reality is that there are days and moments when we just aren't able to achieve what I think we should be "checking off our list". When I become so list-driven and task focused, this causes me to speak with impatience and irritability because I continually feel that I can never keep up with where I should be. Instead of living in constant frustration and feeling like I am not doing enough, I want to be flexible and ready to make every moment a teachable moment. I want to do that with joy. This is hard for me, but not unattainable.
The Lord has used the ideas from the honeycomb words posting from last week, to influence and transform our family in this past week, especially with our schooling experience. I feel like the Lord is helping us to be more joyful with one another and purposeful with the words that come from our mouths. When I teach with joy and pleasant words, it doesn't seem like a "task" anymore. I am thankful for how the Lord can use my inabilities and my weaknesses for His glory. I know it is only through His power that I am able to make changes in my actions and attitudes. My hope with this blog, is that it can be used to build up and encourage others in the body of Christ who have weaknesses and failures, just like me, especially when it comes to the large responsibility of teaching our children. I have appreciated e-mails and prayers from people lately, as I am sharing my school journeys on this blog. I desire wisdom from others, who have walked this road or are having similiar thoughts or experiences.
So.......I am off for an afternoon not guided by any certain "to-do" list. We have subjects we need to cover this week and things we definitely need to work through with school. I am thankful the Lord is teaching me that "school at home" doesn't need to happen according to my perfect agenda, and especially not at the cost of hurtful or impatient words.
Continually learning and thankful for God's grace,
Sarah
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